Tuesday, January 4, 2011

delusions and resolutions

New Years Resolutions are not the thing for me. I'd like to think that at the beginning of the New Year, I reflect back on the mistakes and bad habits of the preceding year and just try to be more aware of who am and what I want to be. I've never been a goal setter. I just think, I really want to do THAT or be THAT way and just do it. Then there are of course a few things that I fail miserably at and I've put those in another category all together, "the demons that must be faced when I'm ready to face them."

2010 was an epic year for our family. It was huge. Surprisingly enough, the only family member still having a hard time with the move is little Mason. He is always saying he wants to go back to Utah. Mostly because of his memories of Lake Powell, but he's under some delusion that his life will suddenly and magically become this exciting Disneylike world of fun if he moves back. Sorry to burst your bubble little buddy! We've signed him up for swim lessons and he's excited to start. He asks me everyday when he's going. Time just moves too slowly for a four year old.

Sean, is he EVER going to learn? I really pray that he comes to an understanding that learning from others' mistakes is much better than making them yourself. He hasn't changed much from this post 2 years ago where he just didn't believe the fire was hot, even after he watched his little brother get burned, he had to check for himself. Let's hope this behavior changes before he hits puberty or heaven help the Gibbons family!

Cooper strives so hard to be the "good child." He is naturally a good kid. But he's also very dependant on the praise and attention of others. I'm really trying to find some activity or way that I can give him what he needs.

I watch as my babies and toddlers have grown into little men. The challenges have gone from scribbling on walls and spilled milk, to "mom, guess what I heard at school today?" and the challenges of how-much-do-I-tell-them-at-this-age?

At the beginning of this year, I find myself projecting even farther forward, to years in the future, when I'm going to be asking myself, "why didn't I hug them more?" or "how did I miss that?" or even "I should have tried harder!"

With all the struggles of raising up these boys to someday be men of strong character, I'm positive that with the help of the Lord and by staying close to the scriptures and teachings of a modern day prophet that I can do it! Nick is incredibly good at gathering us for prayer and scripture study every night. How grateful I am to him for keeping us going!

Proverbs 22: Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

3 comments:

Parkin Family said...

Your boys are the cutest and you are a fantastic mom! I think I am going to adopt your idea of no resolutions...lately I have been just trying to be happy in the moment with what I have in the moment...no wishing for more or something else...I love reading your blog!

flip flop mama said...

I love your posts. Your boys are lucky to have you as a mom!

Jamilla said...

I think you are a great mom! You do an awesome job.
Frankly, I am with Mason...its time for you to move back to Utah (I know its not going to happen) but can you at least come visit? I miss you!